Holidays suck

Recently I was driving in the car with someone who insisted on listening to some stupid cd were Celine Dion sings Christmas music. It was so fucking terrible. I couldn't believe that I was actually putting up with it. Most holiday music sucks anyway. The devil certainly has better music. That's why I believe that if there is a hell, it must be some kind of kick-ass concert all day long. Also, you know the chicks will do ya, because their all un-wed mothers. Ah, jokes.
I get very festive this time of year, you know on dates. I like to get into the holiday spirit by putting a little egg nog in the chloroform I bring with me.
I hate the stuff that people make this time of year. Like ginger bread houses. I can't fucking stand those. I want the little ginger bread man who lives in the house to fall asleep with a lit cigarette so it burns his awful desert house to ground. Don't be offended.